Wednesday, March 27, 2013

The Affirmation

Quote of the Day "I'm off Twitter, I need better Affirmation" - anonymous

The other day in the office the simple statement above turned my head into a world of churning thought. The source of affirmation has been one of great learning for me over the years. Let's first look at the definition of affirmation:

The declaration that something is true - Wikipedia

To better understand what I and most everyone I know am looking for is positive affirmation. We want to know that we are a good person, good father, good husband/wife and that we are valued by our employer and friends.

Today more than likely we are looking for those affirmations in the way of likes or comments on Facebook and Instagram or by reTweets on Twitter. In fact, how often do you check back after you have posted something to find out how many people liked it? That's affirmation! But the question I've always had and what I believe is in the quote above is that this kind of affirmation is fleeting and relatively meaningless.

As a boy I searched for affirmation from coaches, friends and my parents. I desperately wanted it from my father but he lived 3000 miles or more from me most of my childhood. Once I "grew" up it was employers and the others I looked up to. I was constantly looking for a sign that I was good.

I was introduced to Brian Buffini  and it changed my outlook on affirmations. Yes, I know his website is all about maximizing your Real Estate business but there is a huge part of his training and coaching that revolves around your life. It was in this realm that I learned affirmations must come from inside, from yourself first. I learned that if you tell yourself you are good at all things in your life then you don't need others to do it for you. I learned that you can find things maybe you are not good at doing and affirm your way to greatness. I learned that in doing this a new world was created I didn't even know existed. Once you are satisfied you see the small positive affirmations that you were missing. Like the hug Marco gives me every day. That hug is more than an I love you hug, it's a "Thanks for being such a great Dad hug"

I have a short list of things I do regularly to Self Affirm who I am. If I find myself slipping into trouble at work or with the family I refocus on these steps to get myself back in line. By trouble I'm telling you that I'm not perfect. I can be an ass from time to time. When I feel myself slipping into that I come back to these things.

1. I write in a Journal - I focus on the good stuff I did or am about to do.
2. I look myself in the mirror and say good things about myself.
3. I play my guitar often - It sounds really good to me and that's very affirming.
4. I read this little booklet often going through it step by step. It's amazing how well it works.
5. And I finish virtually ever email, blog post and letter with It's a good life...

It's a good life....

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